College Football

Hello again to all of you out there in cyberspace. Welcome to the next edition of Clint's Corner. Today, because the dawn of the college football season is upon us, I want to talk a little bit about how lucky the people in college (especially at my Alma-Mater) have it these days when it comes to football. Then we'll delve a little bit into why I think college students may be some of the dumbest people in America. So here goes…

When I say that today's college students have it great as far as football goes, I will focus mainly on The University of Alabama, because lets face it, what other team matters? (Rhetorical question…the answer is none.) The kids today are basking in the glow of two straight undefeated regular seasons, two trips to the SEC title game, one National Championship, and hopefully another successful run this year. People my age got beat by Captain Earlobe and his stupid fingers every year. (I know La Monroe was bad, but losing to Northern Illinois isn't exactly respectable.) They get Nick Saban (Awesome!) on the sideline, we got Mike Shula (pathetic). They have Greg McElroy, a guy who has never lost a game as a starter. We got Brodie Croyle who could never finish a game as a starter. When he got hurt (always), we got Spencer Pennington and a host of other travesties in the game's most important position. I'm not bitter (lie), I just hope that the students appreciate the sadness that we who came before them had to endure, which finally convinced Mal Moore to fire Mike Shula's retarded a$$ and get Nick Saban to save our beloved Tide.

Now on to why I think college students are some of the dumbest people ever. This doesn't refer to the alcoholic freshmen or the 4th year sophomores out there. No, this regards all the juniors and seniors who utter this phrase "I can't wait to get out of college." I know, I did it too. You think you'll get it all…freedom, money, weekends with no homework. Well let me tell you something about the "real world" you can't wait to be a part of, IT SUCKS! You know what comes with your diploma, responsibility. No more suckling at the tit of your parents for rent/groceries/Keystone Light money. Nope, what you really get is a ton of bills, bosses that treat you like garbage, and the crushing realization that this is what you begged for. So enjoy it morons. And don't say I didn't warn you.

That's all for today folks. Be sure to tune in next week, same bat-time, same bat-channel.

His Holiness, Clint Miller